R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
