she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
