Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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