She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
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