Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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