You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
where are my eyebrows?
Randomize
