What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
All I want is dick and wine.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize
