He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize
