hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
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