do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
I'm bleeding and have questions
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize