This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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