Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
