Yo dont text me then not text me
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Randomize
