then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
Randomize
