How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
