I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
