What a fucking waste of an outfit
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
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