his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
i need some magic done to my vagina
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Randomize