But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
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