Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
false alarm, still single
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize
