She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
