i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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