yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Randomize
