In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Randomize
