Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
