Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
We're too hungover to prance.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
