dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
