I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
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