just come out here and I will go home with you...
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Randomize
