What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
last night I used snow as a chaser
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize