mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Randomize
