Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
