Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
