Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
