I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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