So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Randomize
