At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
ugly people sure do ruin things
where does the pee come out of this thing
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
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