Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
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