i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
