some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
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