As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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