im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
