I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Randomize
