now i know why i became what i already was.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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