That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Randomize
