I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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