And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
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