My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
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