And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
last night I used snow as a chaser
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
