It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
